


lasting, fleeting

by sexy-captain-rexy (smolkatsudon)



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: Alternate Canon, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon, Canon Compliant, Canon Universe, F/M, Feelings, Fen Rau, Fluff, Garazeb "Zeb" Orrelios - Freeform, Kanan Jarrus - Freeform, Not meant to be angst, Not together YET, Romance, maybe bits of it around, whoops
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-08
Updated: 2018-05-08
Packaged: 2019-05-03 22:42:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,101
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14579205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smolkatsudon/pseuds/sexy-captain-rexy
Summary: Ezra likes helping people, it makes him feel a whole myriad of emotions he just can't describe. But he knows he likes it, so he'll keep helping as many people as he can. But the one person he wants to help the most never seems to be asking for help. It's almost like she's holding the weight of her world on her shoulders alone, unwilling to request any help.He doesn't like Sabine's lonesome tendencies, but he knows what it feels like to be alone. He hated it and he knows Sabine must hate it sometimes too.And for that, he knows for sure that there's something he can do to help Sabine.





	lasting, fleeting

“How are you feeling? Good? Bad? Hungry?”

Ezra settles down next to Sabine, taking a look at her tired and conflicted expression and grimacing slightly.

“Fine,” Sabine answers quickly, quite obviously in no mood to be conversing casually with the one who’d been ticking her off all day during saber practice.

Ezra scratches his neck meekly, fully aware of why Sabine would rather sit in silence than speak to him. She never really was an open person anyway, but after having been slightly forced into learning how to wield the darksaber and potentially have to use it to unite people she didn’t really want to see, she’d become a little more reclusive. And as a Jedi, Ezra can practically feel the negativity ebbing off of her in waves and crashing into his own person every second.

So he opts to just sit there, providing her with the comfort of his company without the awkwardness of his words. He knew from experience that the presence of someone you cared about was always a nice thing to have when you’re feeling down, and although he’d prefer more action than patience, he figured this time for Sabine’s sake that he would do as she would have done for him.

Though, even  _ he  _ gets bored sometimes. Sitting in silence and looking at nothing in general makes him antsy, and with the silence that came after Fen and Kanan’s departure for the rebel base for a while to finish some business, Ezra lost some of his energy. Sabine had a multitude of thoughts to distract herself with— that he knew— but he didn’t, and for a moment he wonders if he’ll go crazy with the amount of himself he had.

Perhaps he should just meditate? Kanan spent  _ hours _ doing that. Maybe he could do the same and pass some time with that.

“How do you do it?”

Ezra flinches at the sudden sound of Sabine’s voice, pulling himself out of his thoughts and his preparations to meditate. He turns his head towards the normally bold girl but still finds her looking away into the far distance. Her hands shift and he looks down to see her fingers wound tightly around the handle of the darksaber. When he stills himself, he can see that her hands are shaking, only for a few moments though, before Sabine pulls the hand away to hide it at her side.

“‘Do’ what?” Ezra repeats, biting back his usual quips in exchange for more serious words fit for the situation.

“You know…” Sabine pauses, lifting her hands into the air and waving it about, as if the motions would help her explain what she couldn’t. But it isn’t enough for her and she lets out a frustrated sigh, dropping her hands back down, tucking them closer to her torso. “How do you manage to do everything  _ right _ ?”

Immediately, Ezra can feel the distress from Sabine, but he doesn’t know if he’s feeling this through the Force or simply from knowing Sabine. He’s been with her for a while, and after practice even  _ he _ knows when Zeb is in a mood to talk or not. Of course, the constantly isolated Mandalorian is much harder to read than Zeb is, but there are signs and Ezra’s learned to pick up on them so that he doesn’t get an explosive in his pocket.

“Well, I don’t think I ever do things  _ right _ ,” Ezra starts, shifting his position so that he’s staring off into the direction that Sabine is looking towards again. “And that depends on what you think is right in the end, Sabine.”

“I guess so,” Sabine responds, clearly unconvinced. Ezra glances at her from the corner of his eyes and frowns. He doesn’t like it when Sabine falls hard like this, preferring her when she’s at her best and acting out as she always does. Her silence is more than enough to make Ezra feel a little uncomfortable.

“If it helps, I think you’re doing really well?” Ezra adds, leaning a little to the side to nudge Sabine’s shoulder. He can hear Sabine hum and he holds his position, waiting for Sabine to respond with the words he  _ knows _ is whirling around somewhere inside of her.

Instead, she says nothing for a while, but Ezra waits and waits. He wants to be there for her, just like the times when the Ghost Crew was there for him. He lets his eyes linger on her face for another quick moment before he turns away to face the faraway horizon. He doesn’t shift out from his leaning until minutes tick by, but just before he does, he feels a tentative touch to his arm.

She still says nothing and all there is around them is the peacefulness of the planet resting as the stars shine above. The touch on his shoulder gets a little bolder and bolder with each second until Sabine is resting against Ezra’s shoulder. Thinking that it would be easier for the both of them, Ezra shuffles closer and closer until their arms are flush against each other. Sabine slips away for a second and Ezra starts to get nervous.

Did Sabine not appreciate it?

Is she angry now?

Can he survive until Kanan comes back to resume training?

He feels more weight pressing against his arm and tentatively glances over to the girl. He can see her leaning against his arm, resting her head on his shoulder. Leaning forward slightly, Ezra can see that her eyes are closed and he moves back, settling down to give Sabine the rest she deserves.

“Thanks, Ezra,” comes a soft voice, something he never thought he’d hear.

“Yeah, no problem, Sabine.”

Ezra smiles at the sight of Sabine trusting him enough to be leaning on him both spiritually and physically, happy that Sabine could trust him like this. But deep in his heart, he wishes he could help Sabine. He knows that the trials she needs to face are hers and hers alone, but he wishes that she’d at least let him carry some of the burden so that it wouldn’t be too hard on her.

Letting out a sigh, Ezra relaxes himself, slowly moving his head to rest on hers. Her hair tickles his cheek and faintly smells like paint, but it’s really soft against his skin. Beneath his sudden weight, Sabine shifts but doesn’t move away from his action. 

He knows he can’t help Sabine completely, and sometimes that fact really annoys him, but he knows that he can always be there. Just in case she  _ does _ need someone somewhere down the road.


End file.
